Have you finally orgasmed yet?
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Randomize
