so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
