awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
