Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
it's like iHOP with fire
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
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