I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize