Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize
