It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
The dick lei will go down in squad history
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Randomize
