He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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