direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
Just pee around me
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Randomize
