the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Randomize
