She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Randomize
