Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
