What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Randomize