I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
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