Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
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