if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
the condom got lost in my hair
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
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