So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
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