so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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