and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Even the bartender felt bad for me
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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