Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Randomize