oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
