Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize