Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
i think i scared a bird with my dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
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