Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
