Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
