Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
