what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
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The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
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You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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