spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
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