I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
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Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
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Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.