She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
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I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
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I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Randomize