It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize