idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
