i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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