My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Randomize
