She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Banned from zoo.
Again?
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
Randomize
