im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
