No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
