dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
