the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
