That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
oh god was she eating orange peels again
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Randomize
