Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Did you pee in the oven last night??
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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