i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
Randomize
