My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
Randomize
