I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
