There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
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