what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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