Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Randomize
