shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Randomize
