Your tits are I can't wait for
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize
