But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
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