so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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